4 Leadership Tips to De-escalate Situations
Leaders take on multiple roles, one of which is that of a mediator. Our primary focus should be on serving others and developing more effective leaders. It is not just about what we say, but how we consistently demonstrate our values and actions to others.
Disagreements and misalignments are a common occurrence in any organization and are not conflicts. Many companies encourage them as they lead to stimulating conversations and new ideas. Some organizations even pride themselves on disrupting themselves before the economy or shifting markets force them to.
At the same time, leaders need to be mindful of situations that may make their workers uncomfortable, tense, anxious, or uncertain. Ignoring such possibilities will not help in any way. Leaders must approach conversations with workers with open minds and hearts, as it is a great opportunity for leaders to demonstrate skills that can be emulated by their followers in their future careers.
To achieve a mutually respectful and peaceful solution with others, leaders can adopt the following four tips:
TIP #1. LISTEN TO HEAR. Leaders should start or join a conversation with an open mind and without any preconceived notions or biases. The goal should be to learn and gather information. Often, conversations get derailed within the first four minutes because people assume that they know what others are thinking or feeling without asking for clarification or validation. It's important to avoid such self-limiting beliefs and focus on listening actively and asking questions to understand others' perspectives.
TIP #2. REMAIN HUMBLE AND OPEN TO LEARN. None one knows it all; therefore, our most valuable skills are to listen and actually hear what others are saying and not saying and how they are saying it. Even the words being used describe the intensity of our feelings and emotions. If a casual word is used, then the person is typically feeling fine. If a stronger word is used to describe a thought or emotion, it is a signal that this is important to this person and the leader needs to further unpack what is making the conversation or situation an emotional investment for them. The main topic of discussion is rarely the true concern. For example, if a team member’s request for additional funding is declined. The leader may need to deal with the feeling of rejection before addressing the backstory or reason for declining the request. Therefore, leaders must be humble, open to learning, and not take things personally. Tough skin is needed to be an effective leader.
TIP #3. ASK QUESTIONS FOR CLARIFICATION. Every individual has their unique perspective which influences how they define and interpret words. Therefore, it is crucial for leaders to avoid making assumptions about what others are feeling or meaning. Leaders should make an effort to understand and validate others' thoughts and feelings and give them a platform to express themselves. It is important to acknowledge and respect their views. Genuine and transparent leaders of organizations recognize that they are not necessarily the experts in the room. Their role is to identify and hire experts, ask them questions, evaluate the information, and make decisions for the organization.
TIP #4. COLLABORATE ON THE NEXT STEPS. After the leader has thoroughly discussed the concerns with the participants, it is essential to summarize what has been heard for further clarification and validation. Then, participants should be invited to collaborate and design a plan that outlines the next steps and an action plan of accountability for all involved parties. In most cases, people prefer to be heard and participate in creating a path forward. Nobody wants to be ignored or leave a discussion feeling like a statistic.
Effective communication is at the heart of many family, organizational, and global issues today. It is something that can be improved at any time by being open and having a productive and heartfelt conversation. Remember, the true role of a leader is to lead people.
Learn more in my newly released book titled, "THINK Globally, LEAD Strategically." ~ Dr. PMaddox